


My Hands Ache To Hold Yours

by Monsterhp



Category: Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson
Genre: M/M, Other, for now this is all i have, i havent written properly in 3 years, i will add more as i update, moomin au, royal moomin au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-13 21:31:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19259539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsterhp/pseuds/Monsterhp
Summary: This is technically the third part in my moomin royal au, you can find the first two parts on my Instagram @ monsterlv19 along with a bunch of doodles and other pictures I have done. You can also find me on tumblr under the same name!I wanted to try something different and try writing again? I haven't written anything properly in a long time.Comments are greatly appreciated!





	1. Chapter 1

The humid summer air was cooling down as the sun slowly set over the kingdom. Moomin sat by his window, thinking of nothing in particular as he watched the bustle of the royal staff below. He was about to retreat inside to start getting ready for bed when he was suddenly hit in the face with a pebble, confused and startled Moomin rubbed his face and turned his attention to the attacker,

"Who did that??" Moomin was about to climb down the ladder that rested outside his window and give whoever decided to use his face as target practice a piece of his mind when the familiar green patched poncho caught his attention, Snufkin sheepishly smiled and scratched the back of his head.

Cupping his hands around his mouth he shouted, "I'm sorry! I wasn't aiming for your face, truly."  
"What are you doing here? it's getting late, have you not picked up the mail already?"  
Snufkin shook his head, "No, I have." Moomin noticed some of the garden staff eavesdropping, finishing up the final touches on the rose bushes. “Can I just want to see my Fiance?” Moomin felt his face grow hot, “of course you can," he replied. 

Snufkin put a paw on the rope of the ladder, "I found myself missing your warmth on this cool summer evening, my dove. I was hoping you'd come down and keep me company for a while?" Moomin gripped the window sill.  
"Perhaps we could take a walk or we can simply sit and talk?" 

Moomin nodded, then remembered his voice. "That sounds lovely."  
Swinging himself over the window sill, Moomin made his way down the ladder where Snufkin stood, he reached his paw out to grab hold of Moomin's once he landed.

Once they were far enough outside the castle walls, Snufkin let go of Moomin's hand, wrapping his cape around him tighter he looked up in the sky, the sun had set and the moon was especially bright.  
"Why did you really want to go for a walk, Snuf?" 

"What? I need a reason to go on a walk with my fiance?" Snufkin smiled and nudged Moomin's side. Moomin simply rolled his eyes and laughed.  
Snufkin eventually opened his bag and pulled out a notebook and pencil, "come, sit, make yourself comfortable." Snufkin brought Moomin over to an opening, there was a log by a burnt out campfire not far from Snufkin's tent that sat a few feet away. Moomin suddenly got very nervous with how alone they were now, he didn't realize he'd just been staring as Snufkin remade the fire.  
"Moomin? Are you alright?"  
"Yes, yes sorry." quickly he sat down. Snufkin sat not long after, close enough to where their shoulders were brushing as he opened his notebook.  
"We have to make boundaries and rules, right?"  
Moomin nodded as Snufkin wrote on the top of the page, "The official contract"  
Moomin snorted, "This is so weird, sorry" Snufkin ignored him and drew a little bullet point. 

"I think first we should talk about affection, what are we both comfortable with?" Moomin nodded and started to think, Snufkin doodled in the margins of the paper while he waited. Moomin was pretty okay with a lot of things. There wasn't much he wasn't comfortable with, so it felt safer to ask Snufkin,  
"What are you uncomfortable with?"

Snufkin tapped the pencil to the paper, "I think..we shouldn't kiss unless absolutely necessary." 

"Even cheek kisses?"

"Those are fine. but i think that should be as far as it goes. I was talking more about proper kissing." Moomin nodded and Snufkin wrote down at the first bullet point,  
"-Everything but kissing is okay."

Moomin watched as Snufkin wrote down a few more bullet points, simple things like,  
"-Date night must be held at least once a week."  
“-Wedding rings must be worn at all times, even if we are alone.”  
"-We break it off before winter, when Snufkin travels and the kingdom hibernates."  
And, "-Snufkin and Moomin will make time for wedding plans with Mama, Papa, The Mymble and The Joxter” Moomin added onto that point, “Only if Joxter bathes first.”

Snufkin passed the notebook to Moomin who wrote down a bullet point,  
"Wait, what? The annual Truce Ball?" Snufkin's tail twitched, Moomin nodded and set the notebook aside. 

"You don't have to stay long, but it'd be nice for you to show up, with me. Together." Snufkin just stared at the notebook, like it will magically ignite. Moomin put his paw gently on Snufkin's.

"It's not that bad, trust me. We show up, make it believable that were engaged so the other kingdoms will be aware, have a dance, eat some food. And we can leave immediately after that."  
Snufkin finally looked up at Moomin, his eyes were blown wide and he was a lot closer than Moomin remembered.  
Moomin forgot how to breath, Snufkin's eyes reflected the fire light, glowing and reminding Moomin of a story he read about cats eyes always reflecting the sun and that's why they glowed at night. Moomin wanted to lean in, wanted to run his paw through Snufkin's hair, and down his arms to hold his paws.  
Moomin realized Snufkin is full of edges, his sharp claws and eyes, and the way he holds himself against the world like it will attack without warning.  
Moomin decides he doesn't mind the sharp edges if it means he can also hear the softness of Snufkin's voice when he talks about the stars, or the ocean. Or see the roundness of his face he hides behind that hat of his.  
Moomin decides he doesn't mind at all.  
Snufkin pulls back far too soon and Moomin is left feeling exposed, so he picks up notebook and signs the bottom of the paper, handing it to Snufkin to do the same.

Their walk back to the castle is silent, upon reaching the entrance of the kingdom Moomin stops on the bridge, he grabs hold of Snufkin’s paws,  
“Maybe you should set up your camp here.”

“What?”

Moomin shrugs and looks down at the river water, “Well, its closer than where you are currently, if we were really getting married, wouldn't it make more sense for you to be as close as you can?”

Snufkin nodded, looking down at the water. “I suppose so. But that wasn't in the contract, ya know.” 

Moomin held up Snufkin's paw and kissed the back of it.  
“Just something to think about.” They both continued to walk until they reached the entrance of the castle, by now it was too late for anyone to be awake to see them arrive, or to see the kiss Snufkin places on Moomin’s cheek, or the way they linger for a moment too long before departing.

The next morning Moomin wakes up and sees a small green tent next to the bridge.


	2. Isn't It Romantic?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He sat there on one knee, talking of spending all his time with Moomin, of how he misses him on his travels and how Moomin is the highlight of his day when he finally comes to deliver and pick up the mail at the castle. Moomin sighed and turned into the kitchen.  
> If only it was all true.

2 weeks had passed since the contract was signed. 2 weeks of being closer to Snufkin than ever, and weeks of wedding planning and preparing for the Truce Ball.  
Why was planning a wedding so hard? Moomin traced the wood grain of his desk, he was tired of looking at color swatches and decoration layouts. Why couldn't he and Snufkin just get married without all this planning? They could sneak off to a nice chapel somewhere and get married then. In nothing but the clothes they were already wearing, just the two of them. 

"Oh." Moomin said to himself shaking his head, "But that can't happen, we aren't actually engaged." Standing up, Moomin made his way out of his room, he couldn't stop his thoughts.

"It sure would be nice to marry Snufkin.." He wondered out loud. Looking down he turned his hand around, oh how he wishes he could be holding Snufkin's hands right now.  
Moomin's eye caught the engagement ring on his finger, a beautiful sleek gold.

Moomin and Snufkin thought it best to actually propose to each other, Snork crafted a pair of beautiful engagement rings and they mustn't go to waste. What Moomin didn't expect was for Snufkin to get down on one knee in the middle of the market, grabbing hold of Moomin's hand and holding up a black box. He even prepared a speech! Oh, how wonderful it was when Snufkin said his name, full of love and adoration!  
He sat there on one knee, talking of spending all his time with Moomin, of how he misses him on his travels and how Moomin is the highlight of his day when he finally comes to deliver and pick up the mail at the castle. Moomin sighed and turned into the kitchen.  
If only it was all true.  
"Moomin, there you are!" Looking up Moomin saw Snorkmaiden as she reached out and held onto his arm.  
"I'm sorry?"  
"Oh, don't tell me you forgot, silly!" Snorkmaiden lead him out if the kitchen and he stared wistfully at the nice cookies that sat on the island as they slipped further away from his line of sight.  
"You and Snufkin must practice dancing!"  
"Oh, yes. I remember." He did not remember.  
"We did not progress much Tuesday! Snufkin still looks at his feet instead at you!"  
"He is fairly shorter than me, it would probably strain his neck to look me in the eyes that long"  
Snorkmaiden hummed, "he might have to wear heels to see you properly, then."  
Snorkmaiden twirled herself in Moomin's grasp, they both laughed a little as she courtesies, Moomin bows in response and she held onto his arm again, still giggling. 

"Oh, how romantic it is, Moomin!"

"What is?"

"Everything! to be in love, and to dance like your the only ones in the room..Even if Snufkin isn't good at it." 

Moomin snorted, "Oh, cut him some slack. He wasn't forced into dance classes as a kid like we were." 

"Yes, yes, I know." She waved her paw in the air, "He was raised in the woods by local mountain lions who do not know how to bathe or eat with proper manners et cetera, et cetera."

Moomin smiled, "Oh, Joxter does not compare to mountain lions!!!"  
They both laughed, as they neared the doors to the empty ballroom they have been practicing in.  
Snorkmaiden squeezed Moomin's paw before going inside. 

Inside were Little my, Alicia and Snufkin. They sat in the middle of the dance floor looking up upon their entrance, the door slamming shut from its weight. Snorkmaiden made her way over to Alicia to stretch while Moomin placed his crown and cape on a nearby chair, next to Snufkin's things. Moomin made his way to meet with everyone else when he caught Snufkin stretching with Little My being anything but encouraging as he tries and reaches his toes. Snufkin had discarded his poncho and green tunic, wearing a light gray undershirt. Moomin sharply turned away and faced Snorkmaiden and Alicia, who announced  
"Okay, I think we're good to go!”

About 30 minutes into the lesson was all it took before Snorkmaiden got frustrated and stopped them, pulling away from Alicia she put her paws on her hips.  
"This isn't going to work if you two are so far apart!" 

Alicia nodded, "don't be afraid to be close, and stop thinking so hard about the steps Snufkin. You just have to let Moomin lead." 

Snufkin pulled his hand away from Moomin's, his face was flushed and he rubbed his wrists.  
"Im sorry, I'm simply having a difficult time keeping up." 

Moomin let his hands drop to his side not knowing what to do with them now. He suddenly felt very cold despite sweating.

Alicia pat Snufkin's back, "That's okay, why don't we take it from the top again?" Alicia walked back over to Snorkmaiden. Their hands went up and met in the middle, their fingers intertwining.  
Snufkin didn't move, his hands still massaging his wrists, Moomin reached over and gently held Snufkin's hand.

"Just watch me, okay?" Moomin reached down and kissed the top of Snufkin's hand.  
Snufkin nodded before putting his hand up and against Moomin's like Alicia and Snorkmaiden.  
Little My started the record over again.  
And so they danced, Moomin spun Snufkin around much like he did with Snorkmaiden in the hallway earlier, only when Snufkin met with Moomin again, his eyes were on his, and they were wide again like they were two weeks ago at his camp. Moomin forgot once again how to breath. He needed to put space between them, yet when he tried to lengthen the distance between them Little My came up and pushed Snufkin closer. 

"Did you not hear what they said??" She would say, a smirk plastered on her face, and Moomin felt like he was about to explode. He could feel everything so intensely, the roughness of the pads of Snufkin's paws, and the cold tile against the bottom of his own feet. The little distance they would get between them with each spin and twirl felt like an ocean that would swallow Moomin up. Yet Snufkin was the lighthouse leading him to shore, and he felt himself leaning forward, Moomin could have sworn Snufkin was as well.

Moomin only caught his breath again when Snorkmaiden and Alicia ran up and congratulated them. Startling them both to lean away from each other.  
Alicia beamed, "That was so much better!! If you guys keep practicing like that you will be ready for the Ball next week in no time!" 

Snorkmaiden smiled and nodded, "all we really need to do is figure out a proper outfit for Snufkin.

Snufkin tore his paw away from Moomin's as he headed over to his stuff, "A what?"

Snorkmaiden put her paws on her hips again, "you didn't think Mama and I would let you go to the Ball like that, did you? Not that your outfit is bad! But this is a royal Ball."

Moomin stopped paying attention after that, he looked at his own paws, once again admiring the engagement ring on his finger. 

He felt a hand on his arm as he looked up at Alicia,  
"Are you okay, Moomin? I tried calling your name a few times.." 

Moomin nodded and looked back up at Snufkin, obviously trying to fight having to dress up, his hat in his paws.  
Moomin clasped his paws together, trying to get rid of the emptiness he felt there.  
"Yeah. Yeah, Im okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is almost 3 am but I couldn't sleep before posting this jsfhldjf.
> 
> Check out my Instagram or Tumblr both under the name monsterlv19! Comments are appreciated!


	3. How Did You Know?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh, what a remarkable Moomin. So kind, and so so incredibly soft. Snufkin doesn't understand why he was his first thought when Moomin decided to do this whole fake engagement thing.   
> Snufkin doesn't understand a lot of things, but that's alright.  
> Looking back down at his now empty tea cup, he swirls the tea leaves around before setting down the cup.  
> He understand tea at least.
> 
> "What do you see, dear?" Moominmama glanced at Snufkin's cup.
> 
> "Nothing important." Standing up, Snufkin grabbed his bag and poncho.

To say Snufkin was uncomfortable was an understatement. And to say he was handling the working hands on him well, would also be an understatement.   
Because he's freaking out. His tail won't stop twitching and he had tried to grab it multiple times just to have it stop moving, only for his hands to be gently moved away so Moominmama could continue fussing over whatever nonsense outfit he is wearing. Her paws messing with hems and ribbon and embroidery. Little my had run in a little while before, she was grabbing glitter and shiny ribbon for decorations. Seeing Snufkin she smiled and said,   
"Wow! You actually don't make me wanna vomit, Snufkin!" He had only rolled his eyes in response, big sisters will be big sisters he supposes.  
Although she has a point.

Snufkin doesn't remember ever wearing something this nice before, he always had hand me downs, stuff well worn and old.   
This was new, new and made for him specifically. For him to wear to a fancy ball, another thing he had never done.   
So make that two new things in one week. New clothes, and a Ball.  
Oh yeah, and being engaged to your best friend is certainly a new thing as well. So make that three new things.   
Oh, he felt light headed. Maybe he needed to sit down.

"May we take a break?" Moominmama smiled and stood up, gesturing for him to take off the coat he was wearing.   
Nodding, she took the unfinished coat and set it on the back of a chair, "Why don't I go and grab some biscuits and tea from the kitchen?" Snufkin nodded and said thank you as she walked out the door.  
When Moominmama came back she saw how tired Snufkin looked, slouched at the table chair head in his hand, setting the tea and biscuits down she reached over and held his free hand.

"What's wrong dear?" 

"Oh, it's nothing Mama." Snufkin waved her away, grabbing his tea cup.

"Snufkin, are you feeling a little overwhelmed?" He didn't say anything, because he knew that even if he denied it his face told otherwise.  
Moominmama nodded, she ran her paw comforting over Snufkin's.

"I know its a lot in a short amount of time. But trust me dear, it will be over before you know it. All these decorations, and outfits are just for show. We are expected to keep up appearances."   
Snufkin nodded along, to let her know he was listening.

"But none of it really matters. If you feel its all too much, you come talk to me or Papa, your parents are never too far either."   
Snufkin looked into his tea, watching the leaves float to top.

"I know, Mama." 

Moominmama shifted her gaze to the window, where she saw Moomin in the garden with Snorkmaiden. They were picking out flowers for centerpieces.   
She smiled. Snufkin followed her gaze, his mind wandered, back to that night in the forest. Moomin's hand in his, the feeling in his stomach and warmth in his cheeks when Moomin kissed his hand, and again during dance practice.   
He has never danced before, and frankly he doesn't think he's very good at it, but being so close to Moomin felt so right, that he doesn't really mind having to dance in front of so many people if he could be so close to him again.

Oh, what a remarkable Moomin. So kind, and so so incredibly soft. Snufkin doesn't understand why he was his first thought when Moomin decided to do this whole fake engagement thing.   
Snufkin doesn't understand a lot of things, but that's alright.  
Looking back down at his now empty tea cup, he swirls the tea leaves around before setting down the cup.  
He understand tea at least.

"What do you see, dear?" Moominmama glanced at Snufkin's cup.

"Nothing important." Standing up, Snufkin grabbed his bag and poncho.  
"Mama, I would like to leave now. I can come back tomorrow."

"Of course dear." Nodding, Snufkin walked out. He made his way to the garden, seeing Moomin and Snorkmaiden.

Upon seeing Snufkin approach Moomin waved excitedly, "Snufkin!"

Snufkin waved back, "How are you two?"

Snorkmaiden handed Snufkin some flowers, they looked like roses, buttercups and marigolds.  
"Splendid! How is the outfit coming along?"

"Its going."

"Hm." 

Moomin started tying some red string around the flowers Snufkin was holding.  
"Oh, before I forget!" Snorkmaiden put her own flowers in some protective brown paper before handing them to Snufkin accompanied with a letter.  
"Please deliver these to Alicia when you get the chance? Her cabin is so far away it'd be impossible for me to travel there without losing my nerve."

Snufkin gently tucked the flowers into his bag, making sure they wouldn't get crushed.   
"Of course."

"Another thing, can you two head to the market and pick up some more supplies for the Ball? Its in two days and i'm afraid somebody ate most of the pastries."

Moomin snorted, "you can say Sniff, it's alright."

Snorkmaiden handed Moomin a list, "I won't name names."

Moomin looked over the list, "don't you have your own kingdom? And people to do this for you." 

"Your the one who complains about wanting to do normal things. Do a normal thing. Get me stuff off this shopping list with your finance. A simple domestic life."  
Moomin took hold of Snufkin's hand, "okay, okay, off to do domestic chores." 

Snufkin stared at their hands as Moomin led them out of the garden, he could feel the stares on them as he always can when they are out together. 

Upon their arrival in town, Moomin took the list out and started shopping, Snufkin straying away to trade his own flower bouquet Moomin tied for him for a pouch of tobacco. shoving it into his bag he met back up with Moomin who was having an extraordinarily hard time deciding what was a good watermelon and what wasn't. 

"Knock on it." Snufkin suggested.

"What??"

"Knock on it, like this." Snufkin knocked on a watermelon for example.

"That is stupid. Did you get your tobacco?"

Nodding Snufkin knocked on a few more before picking one up and walking away.  
"I will carry it, you're so tiny. I don't want my fiance pulling a muscle." Moomin gave the vendor some money for the melon and took it from Snufkin.

"I could carry it. I am not that short."

"Sweetie, you're a head shorter than me."

Snufkin blushed and rolled his eyes, marking watermelon off the list.  
Oh, this was going to be the death of him.  
They were about to head to get some spices before they heard a band playing in the town square. 

"Oh! Snuf let's go listen!" Grabbing Snufkin's hand again Moomin led them to the band.   
Soon enough Snufkin joined them, pulling out his harmonica, playing along.   
Moomin just stared, absolutely in awe.  
Someone tugged on Moomin's cape, looking down he saw a little Hemulen child with wild frizzy hair a dark brown, no older than 8 possibly, 

"Prince Moomin, could I ask you a question? My name's Kryda."

"Of course you can ask a question." Moomin could see their parents standing a few feet away.

"How did you know you loved him??"

Moomin choked on air, almost dropping the melon.

"What??" Kryda's parents had absolute fear in their eyes.

"Everyone says you will just know when your in love, but how do you know?"

Moomin looked back up at Snufkin, lost in the music and looking at peace on the stage.  
"Uh..its different for everyone but I think I always knew. Deep down."  
Moomin shifted his weight, thinking back to the nights when he and Snufkin were kids and they would stay up all night talking. Back to when Snufkin would bring him a handful of rocks and twigs that he thought were neat. 

"But was there a moment?"

"A moment?"

Kryda nodded, "Yeah, when you absolutely knew you loved him and wanted to marry him."  
Moomin's chest ached, 

"It was a really hot summer day. And we went to the beach."   
Moomin watched Snufkin wave to him, he waved back.

"Snufkin was fishing, we were drying off after swimming all day. I don't really remember what he was talking about. But I just remember his hair in his face the sun shining on him bathing him in gold and all I could think of was, 'wow, he looks great.'"

Kryda nodded, she obviously zoned out, not really paying attention to him any more and instead listening to the music. He couldn't blame her, it sounded beautiful.  
Snufkin smiled down the stage, his smile bright.  
And Moomin ached, his hand came up to his chest, he was sure if Snufkin came any closer he'd be able to hear his heart beat.

"Let me take the melon now."

Taking the melon Snufkin handed Moomin the list and started walking ahead of him.  
Glancing down at the list Moomin felt his eyes sting.  
Catching up to Snufkin he leaned down and kissed the top of his head.

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my Instagram or tumblr both under the username monsterlv19


End file.
